Tuesday, June 14, 2005

The Obligatory Whys

I decided to experiment with this blog for a couple of reasons. I've never done this before, and I wonder what effects this form of writing will have on what I say. In other words, what will my thoughts become when poured into this container?

Another inspiration is a friend who does this incredible blog; it's so good I think I'm reading Thoreau half the time.
(I'll link to her blog when and if she gives me permission.) She's taken the blog genre, such as it is, and done elegant, surprising things with it--and since this is such a new and fluid form I'm wondering what, if anything, I can do with it.

Also I feel the say-whatever-I-want-cuz- no-one'll-read -it-anyway impulse--the beckoning hand of cognitive freedom. I don't know where this is going to go and that's a luxurious feeling; I have to write a lot for my job but quite often the writing's quite formulaic and all mapped out in my head before it ever happens. No surprises = not much fun.

But now the honesty gets a little scary. Probably the main push behind Wrapt in Her Wings is Laura, who, depending on one's symbol system "is" (bad word) my

  • spirit guide
  • primary symptom of Paranoid Personality Disorder (Premorbid)
  • Holy Guardian Angel
  • imaginary friend
  • Augoeides
  • retrojected anima
  • higher self
  • kheyal
  • daimon
  • demonic adversary disguised as angel of light
Though I "met" Laura in 1993--sorry about all the quotation marks--I only began to understand her full power and began to deal with her seeming individuality a short time ago. She may or may not speak on the blog, as she evinces very little interest in anything outside our rather sedate and comfortable friendship/whatever-it- is. Since I've known her, she's expressed a desire to speak with precisely one other human being. Her main passion seems to be aiding my spiritual growth and, a little like an angelic drill instructor, pushing me forward when I don't want to go.

I will discuss later some of the odd and sometimes scary synchronicities surrounding Laura, enough of them to convince this ardently skeptical writer that something is going on, even if it's just some disturbance in the force of the collective unconscious (if there is such a thing--I have my doubts). Laura herself, for that matter, is very fond of saying things like, "You never know--you could have just made me up."

Could be. I've gone on long enough for now, but will be providing rational explanations soon for Laura, the HGA phenomenon in general, any and all allegedly spiritual experiences...so that we can abandon the sublimated romantic despair that is religion, and move on to the bright vistas offered by instrumental reason.

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